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When it comes to ministering to gays and lesbians, far too many churches have chosen silence over service, or a reactive stance over proactive involvement. But congregations must abandon their comfort zone and minister to a group of people who need to experience the love of Jesus like never before.

With truths drawn from his own personal experiences, youth pastor Shawn Harrison seeks to equip youth workers in ministering to gay teenagers, their families, and the gay community at-large. The church must not compromise truth, he says, but it should not withhold grace either. How gay students first encounter God—personally and communally—and how Christians react to them can determine their subsequent steps.

[[Download a FREE sample here]]

Ministering to Gay Teenagers is filled with wisdom and practical advice on how to respond when a student comes out and how to help the teenager’s family through that journey, too. This book will equip you with solid answers to the questions parents ask, and it will challenge you, your youth ministry, and your church to consider how you can practically minister and serve a group of people who seek deep authenticity in love, character, truth, and presence.

Click here to learn more!!

 
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Shawn Harrison is the founder of Six:11 Ministries, an online ministry resource that exists to proclaim God’s identity and wholeness. He specializes in training youth workers and church leaders in ministering to the gay community, and working with gay teens and their families. Shawn is a youth pastor in St. Marys, Ohio, where he lives with his wife and three kids. He blogs at six11.wordpress.com.

 

 

~Stephanie

 

A Life Changed.

 —  December 31, 2012 — Leave a comment

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Earlier this morning an email came in from a former Group Mission Trips attendee. His story exemplifies the faithfulness of God and His endless pursuit of our hearts. We wanted to share Trace’s story with you! So, keep reading…

“I am 42 years old now, married, and have 3 kids. I was listening to the radio when a commercial came on about the youth work camps. I went to one in 1997 or 88’, its been awhile. It was probably the most life changing and fun experience I have had. I went with my youth group from Indiana. We went to the Navajo Indian reservation in NW New Mexico. I did not want to go at first, I was an introvert, I stuttered so I did not like to meet new people or do new things away from the comforts of my normal everyday life. I was crying because I did not want to go but some how, I do not remember why but I went. My youth group of 6 people went. When we got there we were split up into groups with people from all over the U.S. We worked on 2 houses to weatherize them. I became a social butterfly, as my mom use to say. I had people in my group from Nebraska, Pennsylvania, and Boston. Such a wonderful group of kids we were. The part that changed my life was my group. I figured out that people did accept my stutter and they did not care that I had trouble talking. My group became friends and on the final day I got up in front of the whole crowd, over 500 people and spoke. I told them I really didn’t want to go because I was scared and didn’t want to put myself out there. From that point forward I wasn’t scared anymore, GOD brought me there to surround me with that group of youth– to show me who I was and to not be afraid of who GOD made me to be: Imperfect and stammering. The friends I made that week  I was pen pals with for years. After high school I would travel to see them because we grew so close that week and in our letters. Now, that I  have kids and my oldest is 14 , I want her to experience the awesome time that I had, although she is a strong young girl who knows who she is and has a great giving heart. I feel she would just be over flowing with joy and spirituality to meet kids from all over the U.S. like I did.” 

 

Thank you Trace for sharing how the Lord moved in your life during a Group Mission Trip!

If you’re thinking about a Missions Trip visit the Group Mission Trip (GMT) site here! There are several different missionaly minded events that your youth can participate in! Check them out!!

~Stephanie



Finally after much delay is the official release of UNFILTERED MAGAZINE! Learn more at UnfilteredMagazine.com

Tomorrow Only Unfiltered Magazine will be $5 for a 1 year subscription…see attached image.

“From the editors of Group comes an all new magazine to help youth workers thrive in life…outside the church walls. Real stories by real youth workers on topics like…

Your heart

Your family

Your health

Your money

Your soul

And many more.

Link here http://bit.ly/UsMWNg – for $5 sub rate!

Go get your subscription NOW!!

-Stephanie

I think I am pretty “Hip with the teens” I use social media and guess what, so do they. So here is 5 best practices that I have for myself when I am using Facebook / Twitter / Instagram /

On Being Political – I am Canadian and am often fascinated by the U.S. political system, the parties, the leaders, the “dangling chets”, its all very entertaining. That being said, as a leader and a person of influence, I have to remind myself to be mindful of what we project when it comes to politics. I can’t think of a time that it would be healthy or wise for a Youth Pastor to wade into any sort of heated political discussion with their students / parents as potential audience.  Political views are divisive and division among believers isn’t good for anybody. There is a place to debate but Facebook is probably not that place.

On Being Critical – Last week I wrote about being careful where you criticize, because its confusing to students. Whether explicit or passive aggressive, criticism is not really helpful to your students. Being critical of other Churches, denominations and decisions they make can cause more harm than good for students and friends that don’t understand the issues as well as you. Being educated and informed is important, just be mindful of when, where and with whom you have those conversations.

On Being Sketchy – Always remember your audience, and that video your friend sent you, that awesome Meme or funny cartoon will be seen by your eight grade student and his mom. Avoid innuendo, crudeness and anything that could be taken the wrong way. Save that joke for your next dinner party or just save it you know? One of my leaders recently told me he shared something he found online with his students and I nearly fell off my chair, not because of what he shared with them but that he was unsuspectingly endorsing the website it was from. Be thoughtful about what doors you might accidentally open.

On Being Transparent – If you are going to be on social media, and let people into your living room so-to-speak, give them an accurate picture. If you have kids, make sure that every photo isn’t staged and that people can get an understanding of your daily pursuit of a Christ-like life. The good the bad and the ugly.

On Being a Follower – Follow your people! What I mean is people close to you, your students, leaders, your church members. Not following or connecting with the people you minister too makes Twitter a shout of information more than a catalyst for conversation. Following your people allows you to know what God is doing, in all aspects of their life and allows you to know how you can pray for them or find common ground to connecting. Good leaders are great followers.

Geoff – @geoffcstewart 



Whether you are a youth pastor, parent, teacher, or random person in the mall, you know that teenagers (along with several other age ranges) are addicted to technology in some form or another. It does not help that this is the most plugged in generation with iPhones, iPads, laptops, televisions, Xbox 360, and every other digital screen that you can imagine.

This has caused many people to worry. The death toll for people texting while driving in the last five years is over 16,000 people, families have transformed from Friday nights together to everyone in their own room in the basking glow of their digital device, and many teenagers are showing symptoms of withdrawal from studies that have looked at fasting from technology.

The question is, how can we as a community fight back against tech addictions? We have a few ideas for you below.

  1. Tech-Free Church Services
    What would happen if we fully turned off all tech at church and youth groups for the one hour that we are sitting in the sanctuary? This is not limited to the phones of congregation members, but includes all of the monitors in the lobby promoting the Bible studies or iPad that are used to sign up for missions trips. Retreats that have limited or no phone use (do not read “no phones” as leadership should always have a way to be contacted) can make engaging with teenagers easier.

    Maybe you ease into it and only do one Sunday a month and see the success of it. It may not seem like a long time, but soon you begin to talk to church members that you sit beside. Youth pastors now can preach and know that there is one less distraction in the room. Small group leaders know that they have their group’s undivided attention. Relationships flourish and you begin to forget about that tech.

  2. A Tech-Only Room
    So many families want to know how they can reunite their families back in their homes. Teenage boys are in their room playing Xbox, teen girls are in their rooms on the phone, dad’s in the living room watching television, and mom is on the laptop in the study working.

    One experiment that has seen significant success is a tech only room. It contains the only television in the house, the only place you are allowed to get on computers, and the only place you are allowed on the phone. This can cause an inconvenience at first and does not guarantee that families will even converse fully, but it ensures that you get to see family members while they are home. At the same time, for families that have concern for pornography or too much video game playing, this is easily monitored simply by proximity.

  3. Talk About Rules Before You Have To Enforce Them
    Setting up a culture within a church or school system or implementing rules at home that are established before any issues come up have shown to reduce the risk of anything happening before they should. Let your teenagers know what will happen if they text while driving, install the proper monitoring applications, and consistently check up on them. Let them know that if they break rules on computer and gaming usage or do something that is inappropriate, that they will punished a certain way.

    We are not looking to “punish them with the rules” but instead to protect them from the dangers that tech brings. Know why you are putting rules into place and explain it to teenagers or others so that everyone is on the same page. If there is strong pushback, at least listen to what they have to say, regardless if you plan to take their advice. This will show respect for them and may even give you a better opportunity to speak into your teens’ lives.

    When these rules are established, follow them yourself. Teens have the easy excuse right now of texting while driving because adults do it too. Be a good role model and if need be, enact the punishment upon yourself if you break it. At the same time, a reward for following the rules has shown to promote further positive-viewed behavior.

How have you seen a tech-free environment have a positive outcome?

Jeremy Smith is a youth worker at the Air Force Academy chapel, working for Club Beyond, and attending Denver Seminary for his Masters of Arts in Counseling Ministries. He has been involved in Youth for Christ for eight years — check out his blog at Seventy8Productions.

I just got back from vacation.  It was amazing.  You should have seen it, you would have been quite jealous.  Beach house.  Coffee shops.  Bonfires.  Parks with the family.  Amazing meals. I even got a date with my wife.  I have very little photographic evidence of it, and if you and I were friends on social media sites you would have no reason to believe that my life was any different than the other 51 weeks of the year.  Why in the world would I not post this memorable week to share with some of my most distant friends?  I wanted this one to be for my family and those I talk to.

If your life is anything like mine, then the world of what is ministry and what is not becomes very grey.  And beyond that, I can’t say I really want there to be lines.  God has redeemed all of me, and I don’t want to live public and private lives.  However, as calls come in whenever, emails are answered always, and my family is my best sermon illustration I often feel that those who follow me on instagram know as much if not more about me than my own family.

So I made a decision that I would go radio silent for the week.  I did pretty good at it too! I liked a few photos.  Made a few snarky comments.  Responded to a few emails from those people that either wouldn’t leave me alone or had the power to fire me. For the most part, I disappeared.

Now don’t get me wrong.  I post like a bad Mama Jamma.  If I have something Facebook-worthy it goes up.  Kids sleeping on the floor, it is there.  Awesome youth group night; I’m your man.  And frankly there are many vacations where I want to show others my version of a family enjoying themselves.  So I do live loudly when I can on social media sites.  To that end, my wife continued to post this past week, in fact she became louder on vacation.  That doesn’t mean I am a better Christian (for the most part).  It was a personal decision and a gift that I wanted to give to my family.  They may not have even noticed.  That is fine with me.  I just wanted to be present.  To enjoy all of them and capture the event, not the event so it could be communicated to others.

I think you should do the same.  Not always, and for me this is the exception and not the rule.  For some it may be that you take a break on dates, on Mondays, or when the sun goes down.  I don’t think there is one version that is better than another, however I would strongly encourage you to find those moments in your life that are only for those you call family and for those who are dear friends.  Not to be selfish or exclusive.  Rather to silently say to those around you that they are your “circle”.  They are your “friends”.  They are true “followers” of you and your life.  Without saying no to others, it slowly communicates that you are more than a public figure to your church body and the students you minister to.  You are a dad, a wife, or friend.  All of which you need to do well if you hope to be called a youth worker in five years.

To finish this post it would be fitting to show you a vacation picture, but I didn’t really take any.  I promise to show you my next youth event, latte art, or when my kid puts their clothes on backwards.

Jeff Bachman is a husband for the past 11 years and a father of three amazing kids.  He is the High School Pastor at ROCKHARBOR Church just up the road in Costa Mesa, CA.   He loves emails at jbachman@rockharbor.org, twitter interaction, and of course subscribe to his blog The Until Matters.



How much wisdom can you pack into 140 characters?
Quite a bit, it turns out.
Twisdom unpacks truth-filled tweets about 25 important leadership topics, with honest conversation and practical application from veteran youth worker Matt Lawson. He’s discovered the power of using Twitter¨ to create a file of collective and collaborative wisdom from youth workers around the world.
You’ll encounter rich insights on such topics as combating student apathy, turning vision into action, building a stronger relationship with your senior pastor, training and investing in volunteers, and lasting for the long haul. Get a bite-size dose of practical wisdom that will cause you to think beyond 140 characters in your journey to become a stronger leader, youth worker, and Christ-follower.

Check out the book here

My friend Jason suggested I check out this Yahoo! blog article about parenting and social media/web stuff and was right about it being awesome. Here’s a clip:

Institute family meals with tech breaks. Current psychological literature recommends that families sit down and share at least 3 or 4 meals together a week. Keep them short–under 45 minutes–and tech free for the most part. Give everyone a two-minute warning to check whatever device beforehand. After 15 minutes, allow a one minute message or text check. Aim to expand the tech free time as your kids become more focused.

Don’t use your ignorance about technology as an excuse. It’s true that kids know more about technology than parents but this is a poor reason for adults to act clueless about what teens or tweens might be doing online. Equally counterproductive is letting a kid spend hours on end alone in their room on the computer so you “can get work done.”

Don’t rely on secretly monitoring online activities. Not only is it an invasion of privacy, most kids can work around parents’ surveillance in a matter of minutes.

Look for warning signs. If your child is regularly staying home “sick” from school and spending the entire day on the computer, if they choose to be online more often than out with friends, or if their grades are suffering because they are distracted by technology, you need to step in and help them create boundaries. With their input, draft a written contract with clear rules and consequences. Often, parents make initial penalties too big such as grounding their kid for a month if they catch them online in the middle of the night. Better to start small such as losing their phone for an hour and escalate as necessary.

JG